Traffic was terrible. We’re in Houston, we can blame the traffic for everything. I blame the traffic for my incredibly terrible attitude. I was a straight up witch with a B when I walked into Ryde. I acknowledge this.

My biggest only beef with this place is it’s parking. You have more than 30 bikes in your lil spin room, but you are located in a shopping center with only 30 minute parking. As one who was OH SO RECENTLY towed, I’m not comfortable parking in the 30 minute parking space for a 45 minute class. But, I did it. CURSE YOU RYDE FOR MAKING ME DO THAT. I went into minor cardiac arrest when I returned to my car later and whew TG it was there. BUT STILL. Also, if you aren’t running late like I was, park across the street at the garage. No one knows about this garage so it’s always empty and your car will not be towed. (*Disclaimer: I am NOT responsible if your car gets towed. Just like it’s not my fault if mine gets towed. It’s Obama’s. I think.*)

So yes, full on sassy Nat was in her finest form when the spray-tanned, bright-eyed classic hot bro gave me plastic velcro shoes for my “Ryde” and made me sign a waiver. I put my shoes, my purse and my phone in a locker and clunked into the room and found my bike next to Anastasia. She’s chipper. I hate her.

So, I spin often (at least once a week) and still for—I kid you not—10 minutes I tried to figure out how to adjust my bike and how to effing clip my shoes into this effing bike. I *finally* do it right before I was about to flip my bike over Hulk-style (but hey that’d be a good workout). Then our instructor got to his bike and started the class.

I had every reason to hate the newly opened RYDE in River Oaks in my mood, but I didn’t. I had never done anything like it (although I’ve since done Revolution and I see the similarities. These classes are very trendy.) You dance on a bike, in the dark and sometimes you’re asked to yell and get pumped—so not me at all. But, I’m not sure like if it was because I was laughing about how ridiculous it all can be or if I was actually enjoying getting my “swagger” on. Honestly it was a little bit of both. You pedal to the music, which is an element of even the most boring spin classes (you know, the ones without house music and black lights), but the swagger part comes almost naturally when your stepping to the beat. Also, you use weights, which are like 2-3 lbs, as a frequent body pumper, I scoffed…but eek those got heavy fast.

I’ll also say that ouch. You get a workout. I was soaked with sweat—dripping, if that paints a picture. But, you get a cold eucalyptus towel. #necessary

You should go if:

• You’re coordinated—or you can fake it. I’m not sure if I would have enjoyed it if I couldn’t keep the beat. But, I definitely loved it despite my mood once I got the rhythm. Also, if you don’t like dance music, gtfo.
• You check your cheese radar at the door. Sometimes you have to just not. Buy into the whole “you are who you wanna be” deal these spin and yoga classes project. Sometimes I want to roll my eyes and just work out, but I can honestly say if I just buy into it all, I leave happier. Where’s the bad?
• You’re ok with not being the wallflower. I think you really get the most out of it if you mingle with people, talk to the instructor, etc. You’ll feel more welcomed.
• You wanna post game. We got so pumped after, we were sweaty and jazzed for turtle races.